I once confessed to a new friend that I sometimes worried the car door next to my baby’s carseat might somehow fly open as I drove.
Random, I know.
She stared back in what I interpreted as disbelief. And then she said it: “I get scared that my baby will reach over, grab the handle and open the car door himself!”
We lost it laughing.
I can’t laugh at all of my parental anxieties quite yet, but her response reminded me that I need to drop my tendency of thinking I’m the only new mama who can’t knock a long list of fears.
Writing this post reminded me again. Going in, I expected each mama I asked to share one, maybe two, top fears. They sent me lists. Of course I had mine.
Here’s what it all looked like:
“What are your top fears, new mama?”
Mama fear #1:
“We should first talk about how crazy I am about germs. Go ahead and share how I walk myself through a cloud of Lysol every day.”
Mama fear #2:
“Choking from coughing, especially when sleeping.”
Mama fear #3:
“Fear of returning back to work was one. Trusting someone else to basically raise your child.”
Mama fear #4:
“That I’m doing something (or not doing something), which is why my child is always sick.”
Mama fear #5:
“Me not stimulating him enough to make sure he’s meeting his milestones.”
Mama fear #6:
“You should’ve seen me on our last trip. There was always a disinfecting wipe in my hand at all times. I so did not expect to be that person.”
Mama fear #7:
“When nursing, not feeding him enough.”
Mama fear #8:
“Teaching him bad habits.”
Mama fear #9:
“Of bottles not being sanitized enough. Even when caretakers try to help, I always re-sanitize.”
Mama fear #10:
“My baby throwing up in his sleep with reflux.”
Mama fear #11:
“I read that if their neck isn’t in the right position their windpipe can close. I’m always checking the baby’s neck to make sure it’s okay.”
Mama fear #12:
“SIDS. Nighttime is so scary.”
Mama fear #13:
“Clorox is basically coming out of my pores (well, Seventh Generation because now I’m crazy about chemicals.)”
Mama fear #14:
“Of visitors overwhelming the baby or of them getting the baby sick.”
Mama fear #15:
“Of any kind of accident happening that leads to my baby dying, especially due to anyone who’s watching him getting distracted or not paying attention for a minute.”
Mama fear #16:
“That someone will touch the baby’s soft spot too hard, or that the baby will hit it on something and it will give them brain damage.”
Mama fear #17:
“One of my greatest fears is honestly just being away from the baby — that something will happen when I’m gone.”
Mama fear #18:
“Of anyone else holding the baby.”
So let this remind you: You’re not the only one with a list of fears, new mama. Even if the things on it are as specific as driving down the street with a wide-open door.
Do you have mama fears to add? Leave them in the comments below!